Numbness - Prayer

Emotions

In our support group, we discuss common emotions experienced by those who grieve the loss of a loved one to suicide or mental illness. Keep in mind that not everyone will experience these emotions, and they may occur in different orders or with varying degrees of intensity. We may experience a mix of seemingly contradictory feelings simultaneously (i.e. sadness and joy). Strong emotions are a normal part of the grieving process, and there is no "right" or "wrong" way to feel. 

Numbness

When a traumatic loss crashes into our lives, the world can tilt on its axis and the vibrant colors of our lives can drain away leaving a stark, gray landscape. In those initial moments, and sometimes stretching long afterwards, a profound numbness can descend. It's not the absence of feeling, exactly, but more like an emotional anesthesia, a detachment from the raw agony that should be overwhelming.

This numbness acts as a shield, a temporary buffer against the full force of the pain. It's the mind and body's way of saying, "This is too much, too fast. I need time to catch up, to absorb the impossible." Everyday sensations might feel muted, as if experienced through a thick pane of glass. The laughter of others can sound distant and foreign, their concerns trivial in the face of such a monumental shift. Even the reality of the loss itself can feel surreal, an unbelievable nightmare from which we expect to awaken.

While the shield of numbness serves a purpose initially, eventually, it needs to be gently lowered to allow the gradual and often painful work of grieving to begin. Recognizing this transition and seeking support when the numbness feels entrenched is a crucial step towards navigating the long and winding path of healing after traumatic loss. 

"Sometimes I wonder if the “desolating sickness” covering the land, as mentioned in the scriptures, might include mental illness. It is worldwide, covering every continent and culture, and affecting all—young, old, rich, and poor. Members of the Church have not been excluded...I sorrow with those who have lost loved ones far too early and are now left with feelings of grief as well as unanswered questions." -Erich W. Kopische October 2021 "Addressing Mental Health"

Discussion

"Many face significant challenges that cause them great emotional pain. Please know that the Lord is aware of your difficulties and that He loves you individually." Elder Quentin L. Cook, "The Eternal Everyday" (April 2017 General Conference): 

"Our Heavenly Father is aware of our needs and will help us as we call upon Him for assistance. I believe that no concern of ours is too small or insignificant. The Lord is in the details of our lives.” -Thomas S. Monson 

There are millions of God-fearing people who pray to God to be lifted out of their afflictions. Our Savior has revealed that He “descended below all things” (D&C 88:6). As Elder Neal A. Maxwell taught, “Having ‘descended below all things,’ He comprehends, perfectly and personally, the full range of human suffering.” We might even say that having descended beneath it all, He is perfectly positioned to lift us and give us the strength we need to endure our afflictions. We have only to ask. -Elder Dallin H. Oaks October 2015 "Strengthened by the Atonement of Jesus Christ"